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We are thrilled to welcome a new life into the Jewish community and tradition! With blessings that express a family’s gratitude, hopes and commitment, our expert and supportive clergy will guide you through this sweet and powerful time.

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Choosing A Hebrew Name

How to Choose a Hebrew Name for Your Baby
By Rivki Silver

Names are kind of a big deal, Jewishly speaking. A name is said to affect a person’s personality and even their destiny. Your name is the connection to your soul. But no pressure! Really, don’t worry, the Kabbalists teach that when parents are choosing a name for their child, the parents experience a little bit of prophecy, so you’ll probably be just fine.

But still, it’s no easy feat—and for many Jewish parents, the task is doubly hard if you are choosing both an English and Hebrew name. Even if you’re not planning on calling your child by their Hebrew name, choosing it can still be deeply meaningful. I asked the people of Facebook what their primary considerations were in choosing a Hebrew name for their child, and these were the most popular, in no certain order:

1. Family

There’s something beautiful about honoring a family member by naming a child after them. It is a touching way of keeping the memory of a relative alive. Ashkenazi Jews only name after relatives once they are deceased, but Sephardim have the custom to name even after living relatives.

If the relative died young, some people add a name, like Chaya/Chaim, for life, or Bracha/Baruch, for blessing. If the relative had a, shall we say, less than stellar character, some people add the name of someone they admire so that the child might emulate that person. Sometimes family names aren’t ones you necessarily want to use. When my husband and I were naming our daughter, there was a family member who didn’t have anyone named after her yet. She had a Yiddish name, which my husband and I weren’t crazy about (no offense, Yiddish).

One option would have been to use the Hebrew equivalent of the name, but it was somewhat unclear what that would have been. We decided to use the Yiddish name as her middle name and gave her a first name that was relevant to the time of year. Amusingly, we actually call her by her middle name far more often than her first. I’ve even grown fond of it.

Another option would be choosing a Hebrew name that sounds like or starts with the same letter as the deceased relative’s name.

2. Matching

One common tactic is choosing a Hebrew name that will align with your child’s English name. There are plenty of Hebrew names that have very accessible English corollaries, like Sarah, Naomi, or Leah for girls, and Ezra, Daniel, or Asher for boys. Then you can have the convenience of a dually functioning, and easy to pronounce, name. Another option is to choose a Hebrew name that begins with the same letter or sound as the English name. Sadie could be paired with Sarah, Oliver with Leib (Yiddish for lion). Finally, you could choose a Hebrew name that is similar in meaning to your child’s English name. Doing this, Ava, which means life, could lead to a Hebrew name of Chaya, which also means life. Milo, which means merciful, could have Rachamim as a Hebrew name.

3. Meaning

There are two main types of Jewish names: Names that belong to people from the bible, and names that mean something. There are names that fit into both categories, like Deborah, who was a judge and generally awesome woman, and whose name also means bee. Like the insect. Buzz buzz. When naming after someone in the bible, it’s good to consider what the person was like. Are they someone you’d want your child to take after? In my circles, we don’t use names of people who were infamously bad. Just because it’s in the Bible doesn’t mean it should be used.

There are many beautiful non-biblical names like Shoshana, which means rose, or Aliza, which means filled with joy. There are more modern Hebrew names like Amichai, which means my nation lives, or Ilan, which means tree. You can even get creative with name combinations, like Chaya Tova, which means good life. Or Matan Yakir, which means precious gift.

4. Timing

If your baby is due around a major holiday, you could choose from names associated with that time of year. For example, if you’re expecting a boy around Hanukkah, Yehudah (for Judah the Maccabee) or Matisyahu might be options. If you’re expecting a girl in the springtime, you might consider Aviva, which means spring.

Some people like to look at the weekly Torah portion and select a name from there. Others will name after an esteemed person whose yahrtzeit (anniversary of death) is on the day of birth of the child.

5. Pronounceability

This is especially relevant if you’re not planning to give your child an English name. The notorious “ch” sound is one some of my friends avoided using, as a consideration to family, or just to the child. It can be a source of frustration to have your name constantly mispronounced at work, appointments, social settings, etc.

One of our children is named after a family member, which led to our first “ch” sound. I apologized in advance to my parents, but I felt good that at least this child had a pronounceable second name. I didn’t realize that the combination of “tzv” was also very tricky to pronounce! Oy!

6. You just like it

If none of the previous points speak to you, there’s always the method of getting a book of Hebrew baby names (or checking out Kveller’s baby name bank) and going through it. You can wait for that parental prophecy to kick in as you flip through the pages.

Or maybe you heard a name somewhere and it always stuck with you. One of my friends fell in love with the name of a friend’s child, and she ended up choosing it for herself when she converted.

Whatever the name you choose for your child, mazel tov on your new addition! Picking a name is just one of the first steps on this crazy, amazing, evolving trip of parenthood.

Guide to Choosing a Jewish Name

By Rabbi Goldie Milgram

This abridged article teaches how to identify the right Jewish name for yourself, or for your child.

Just as Abraham’s original name was Avram, and Sarai his wife’s, their journey includes receiving the Hebrew letter “hey” into their names to reflect their G*d experience. So, too, it became traditional for parents to intuit and ritually bestow a sacred name upon each of their children. It is customary to withhold public and familial knowledge of this name until the communal rituals of welcome take place. Tradition holds that the name of a soul exists before birth, and what that name is can actually be perceived by the parents. Parents don’t always get this right, so it is possible to change one’s sacred name later in life.

Because one’s name is made from the lashon kodesh--the letters of the holy language of the Jewish people, this name is part of ritually establishing the child’s place within the Jewish people and our covenant of ethical living and shared culture. One’s sacred name ideally gives inspiration for living by creating connection to personal, biblical, literary, or historical Jewish ancestors, or to important ideals or texts.

• A Jewish sacred name is a first name, not a surname (last name), and can also double as a person’s every day name. Last names didn’t come into human society until Roman times; before that a person was known as, for example, Goldie bat Shmuel, Goldie the daughter of Shmuel (Samuel).

Due, scholars typically say, to acts of war like rape, Jewish identity was changed sometime between 200 B.C.E. and 500 C.E. to be determined by whether the mother was Jewish, so that formulation would read:

"Goldie bat Liba, Goldie the daughter of Liba. Increasingly, both parents are listed in naming formats for life cycle rites: i.e., Goldie bat Shmuel v’ Lieba, Goldie the daughter of Samuel and Liba."

A local rabbi will be able to advise you on which format is appreciated in your community.

• The Jewish sacred name will be required on documents for conversion, naming and circumcision, bar/bat mitzvah, marriage and, heaven forefend, divorce, in healing prayers when needed, and in the end, on one’s grave marker.

• If you are a Jewish parent who will be raising a child you do not have a Jewish sacred name, this is an appropriate time to take one for yourself or to amend yours if that is necessary.

In some traditions a master designates for an acolyte his or her sacred name. In traditional Korean families, for example, the father-in-law names the baby. In the Torah, the mother usually does the naming. In modernity, the parents usually find a name on which they can agree.

http://www.reclaimingjudaism.org/teachings/guide-choosing-jewish-name

Brit Milah aka Bris for a Baby Boy
https://www.mayoclinic.org/tests-procedures/circumcision/about/pac-20393550

Why Circumcise?
by Kveller Staff

“If God did not want men to have foreskins, why did He create them with foreskins in the first place?”

Many parents of newborn baby boys have pondered this question, while deciding whether or not to circumcise their perfect little son, or while planning a bris with more than a little trepidation.
In fact, the question can be traced all the way back to the Midrash, a collection of ancient Jewish teachings, where it is posed by Turnus Rufius, the Roman Governor of Palestine in the first century CE.
Rabbi Akiba, the most revered Jewish sage of his time, responds to Rufius: God created an incomplete world, leaving human beings to bring it to greater perfection.

Back in the Bible
In the Torah, God commands Abraham to circumcise himself at age 99. God also specifies that all the generations of Abraham’s male descendents must observe this practice, which God calls “the mark of the covenant between Me and you.”

However, the Torah never indicates why circumcision is what marks this very important covenant. Beginning with Rabbi Akiba, and throughout history, Jewish thinkers have advanced their own explanations. Here are a few:

1. Health & Safety
Philo of Alexandria, a first-century Jewish thinker, first suggested that the foreskin is unclean and can be the cause of disease. In modern medicine, the jury is still out on this issue. Some argue that circumcision is the healthier choice for boys and men, others think it’s safer to avoid the surgery.
Maimonides, the great medieval Jewish philosopher, rationalist, and physician argued that circumcision weakens, without actually harming, the male sex organ so that the sexual desires of circumcised men are moderated. The bodily injury caused to the penis, he said, does not interrupt any vital function, but it does counteract excessive lust.
Though Maimonides was a doctor, medicine has changed a lot since the 12th century. Some contemporary medical studies show that circumcision actually affects sexual pleasure positively, some show it affects sexual pleasure negatively (as Maimonides believed), and others show no difference between circumcised and uncircumcised men. Most medical authorities today are comfortable offering circumcision without concern about significant affects on sexual desire or function.

2. Jewish Distinctiveness
Maimonides also points out that circumcision prevents those who do not believe in God from claiming to be members of the Jewish religion. Since circumcision is so difficult, no one would undergo it unless he sincerely wanted to belong to the Jewish faith. In a sense, then, circumcision functions like a gatekeeper, keeping Jews “in” and others “out,” and contributing to Jewish distinctiveness and survival.
Even Spinoza, the unorthodox 17th-century Dutch Jewish thinker remarked: “Such great importance do I attach to the sign of the Covenant that I am persuaded that it is sufficient by itself to maintain the separate existence of the nation forever.”
This explanation of circumcision can be compelling for contemporary parents who want to make sure their sons grow up to feel a sense of belonging in the Jewish community.
Of course, some would argue that the “distinctiveness” argument is moot in the United States where a majority of all baby boys are still circumcised.

3. Submission to God’s Will
There is a trend among Jewish thinkers to not advance specific explanations for the commandments, and instead accept that all the commandments contribute to a goal of submitting to God’s will. Jewish authorities who accept this line of thinking have argued that the foreskin has no purpose except its removal, an act that symbolizes Jews’ willingness to totally obey God. This, they believe, is reason enough to do it.
New parents–for whom life is unpredictable and full of unexpected and unknown experiences–may find it spiritually meaningful to root the beginning of their parenting journey in an age-old ritual that signifies obedience to a higher power.

https://www.kveller.com/article/why-do-jews-circumcise/

Some Meanings of Brit Milah
By Rabbi Harold Kushner

Reprinted with permission from To Life! A Celebration of Jewish Being and Thinking (Little, Brown and Company).

Jewish weddings are recognizably similar to non-­Jewish wedding ceremonies, and our non-Jewish neighbors have religious traditions–confirmation, first communion–analogous to the Bar Mitzvah, to celebrate their children’s coming of age religiously. But I know of nothing in any religious tradition to compare to a bris, the ritual circumcision of a newborn Jewish boy.

Circumcision involves the surgical removal of the foreskin from the male sex organ. In a world where most religious rituals consist of words and gestures, a world in which explicit references to sexual organs, let alone involvement of sexual organs in religious ritual, is rare, circumcision is certainly unique. It is an ancient ceremony, one that retains its power to move us even as it makes us anxious and uncomfortable…

Often, people will feel squeamish, avert their eyes, even leave the room during the brief ceremony, returning for the festive meal (is there ever a Jewish gathering without one?) a few moments later. Tech­nically, a bris ceremony is not required to make the child Jewish (unlike, say, an infant baptism). The exception is the case where the child’s mother is not Jewish and the circumcision is for purposes of con­verting the infant to Judaism. Yet, over the centuries, Jews have risked humiliation and danger to fulfill this commandment.

What is this rite so different from anything else we do in our Judeo-Christian society? Like other Jewish rites, it does not change things; it celebrates them. In this case, what is being celebrated is the continuity of Jewish identity, passed on from father to son. At the bris, the child is given his religious name. Typically he will be named after a deceased relative, to give that relative a measure of immortality, to “make the name live on” and to emphasize that the newborn child is the latest link in a long chain. Presumably the foreskin is designated to be removed from the generative organ to symbolize the fact that Jewish identity is passed on by birth, from father to son, from generation to generation.

In the ancient Near East, many societies circum­cised their male children. In the story of Saul and David in First Samuel, the Philistines, a Greek people rather than a Semitic tribe, were considered unusual and referred to as “the uncircumcised” because they did not practice that custom. But in that era, boys were circumcised when they became adolescents, as a preparation for being sexually active and as an ordeal of entry into the adult community. (And you thought studying for a Bar Mitzvah ceremony was hard!) Ancient Judaism removed the sexual dimen­sion from the ritual by moving it back to infancy.

The complete name of the ritual is bris (or brit) milah, with the second word meaning “circumcision” and the first word meaning “covenant.” The circumci­sion ceremony identifies the Jewish child as a member of the covenant with God by virtue of his birth as a Jew into a Jewish family.

Obviously the week-old infant is in no position to understand what is happening to him. But as he grows older and learns about it, and as he one day arranges for a similar ceremony for his own son, he comes to comprehend the twofold meaning of the bris: A Jew is born into the covenant with God whether he wants to be or not, and this covenant involves pain and sacrifice as well as honor and sanctity. He may grow up to be a good Jew or a bad Jew (however that is defined). But he cannot ignore his Jewish identity. Like his parents, like his physical traits and the century and country of his birth, it is one of the facts of his life. As in the Book of Jonah, as in the Book of Ezekiel, God pursues us even when we would rather not deal with Him. The covenant can be violated; it cannot be escaped. It is part of who you are, branded into your flesh at birth.

https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/some-meanings-of-brit-milah/

https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/reasons-for-brit-milah/

http://www.kveller.com/why-i-circumcised-my-sons/?ga=2.79916631.1101749333.1559666263-1327952219.1538721215

Baby Naming

Long before contemporary rituals for welcoming a Jewish baby girl into the tradition and giving her a Hebrew name, Jewish communities had special customs. There is not the same physical component of circumcision for a boy’s brit milah (covenant of circumsion), but all the same expression of love, commitment and blessing for a girl’s brit bat (covenant of a daughter) or simchat bat – (celebrating a daughter).

https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/welcoming-jewish-daughters/

https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/a-new-welcome-for-jewish-daughters/

https://www.myjewishlearning.com/article/history-of-ceremonies-for-girls/